Poetry & Words, Theology

That’s the one thing you can’t do, when you’re a sojourner

The one thing you cant do when you're a sojourner (a post on #grief from the Oaxacaborn blog)

When you’re a sojourner, you miss milestones. You miss friends’ graduation open houses, you miss engagement parties, you miss their weddings. You see the highlights, but you miss all the late nights. You miss the unsung moments that expand gloriously to fill the spaces between each infrequent occasion we mark with a long distance  text, or an even less-frequent card.

And then, as time passes, you start missing something else, too.

You miss the funerals.

Your friend dies, and you can’t be there for the funeral.

Your friend’s mother dies, and you can’t be there for the funeral.

Your friend’s baby dies, and you can’t be there for the funeral.

It is not true that distance makes the heart grow fonder. Distance actually makes the heart swell with grief, makes ones whole being ache deeply, wearily, at the realization that

you

can’t

be

there.

Distance  means you can’t be there

to silently hold,

to cry alongside,

to weep together.

They tell you nothing is the best thing to say in the face of grief.

They don’t tell you how impossible it is to fill a blank card with mutual tears, fold it into a stiff envelope, and drop it down down down into the unknown darkness, where it will sail away, carried by unsuspecting hands, and finally land in a faraway box, alone and a bit worn around the edges.

They tell you just to be there.

And that’s the one thing you can’t do, when you’re a sojourner.

Inspiration, Little Style

A Global-Themed Bedroom for a Tiny Adventurer: An Original Interior Design Project

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Earlier this year, a kids’ room I styled was featured in the winter print edition of Babiekins Magazine. I shared photos on Instagram and Facebook — but I just realized I never posted any images here on the blog!

It was such a tremendously fun project. I started with the idea of exploring all the different methods of transportation available across the world — ships, camels, elephants, motorbikes. When I walk into this space, I can immediately imagine rattling down the streets of Italy in a Vespa, lifting up high over the ancient ruins of Myanmar’s Bagan in a hot air balloon, or sailing across the waters on a creaky wooden ship.

I tried to pull in as many elements as I could from various countries, too. There’s a doll brought back from a friend’s visit to Kenya, a red and gold bowl and dumpling spoon from Taiwan, pink Hmong textiles, a yellow and fuchsia strand of mirrors and bells originally meant to decorate a camel, an embroidered dress from Guatemala, a row of delightful matryoshka illustrations representing different cultures.

And there’s a cozy reading nook, too, because what better way to transport yourself across time zones and eras than through books?

Thanks to the always-amazing Priscilla Barbosa for capturing this room through her camera lens.

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

Interior Styling: Gina Munsey | As seen in print edition of Babiekins Magazine

INTERIOR STYLING Gina Munsey | PHOTOGRAPHY Priscilla Barbosa

MOBY CURTAIN Thomas Paul via Burke Decor | CAMEL SWAG AS GARLAND WomanShopsWorld on Etsy | EICHO TWIN BED Spot on Square | FLOAT GRAPHITE SHEETS Unison | MR. N LAMP Koncept via Lamps Plus | VESPA PILLOW In the Seam | MOUNTAIN PILLOW JuniperWilde on Etsy | PYRAMID PILLOWCASE Xenotees via Design Life Kids | PASTA AMORE PILLOWCASE Sack Me! via Design Life Kids | PEONI PILLOWCASE Affinita’ Moderne | FACE PILLOW Lately Lily | PAINTED ELEPHANT NECKLACE Gunner & Lux | INDIA TOURISM POSTER Vintage Reproduction
 | BOOK PAGE Vintage Reproduction from Taiwanese School Book | MARITIME CURTAIN Thomas Paul via Burke Decor | ANANA ELEPHANT LAMP Mr. Maria via Cool Kids Company | VINTAGE HMONG TEXTILE PILLOW BohoPillow on Etsy | SEAGRASS RUG Sisal Rugs Direct | AREA RUG Hayneedle | HAPPY PRINT Colette Bream | MATRYOSHKA PRINTS AmyPerrotti on Etsy | HARU DOOR DECAL Made of Sundays | FLOKATI SHEEPSKIN RUG Shades of Light | BE THOU MY VISION PRINTABLE Jessica Sprague | YELLOW THROW Vintage | ELEPHANT GARLAND ON CHAIR Dot & Bo | ELEPHANT BOOKEND TheGoldenLittles on Etsy | BOOKS Vintage | TRAVELING GIRL BOOK Lately Lily MOBY DICK BOOK Baby Lit | MOBY TOTE BAG Baby Lit


Inspiration

INSPIRATION :: Watercolor Illustrations

september-in-vail-maia-larkin

September in Vail by Maia Chavez Larkin of The Voyagers

Colors-and-Characters-of-China-Book

Excerpt from the book “Colors and Characters of China” by Loretta Roberts

Courage+Dear+Heart+1st+Pic
“Courage, dear heart” print via the Graceland Shoppe

Oliver Jeffers Fish

Fish illustration via Oliver Jeffers

CaravanVikkiChu detail2VikkiChu

Caravan by Vikky Chu

For+This+Child+1st+Pic
“For this child I prayed…” via the Gracelaced Shoppe

A few pretties for your midweek enjoyment. <3

Life in Photos

LIFE IN PHOTOS :: Perfect[ly Imperfect]

WEB_March2015_Aveline_grumpy_bed

Have you seen the new photoblog Sham of the Perfect? It’s so beautiful.

Life as it is, life as it’s lived.

No need to make a scene. No need to impress.

WEB_March_2015_Vertical_Spider-PLant_Oaxacaborn
March2015_ShamOfThePerfect_GoodMorning

That tangled head of hair, morning’s first light, the one brown crinkled leaf that catches that light….

WEB_March_2015_Vertical_Bedroom_Oaxacaborn

…the pent up energy on the afternoons the rain falls down around us, the mismatched pajamas, the out-of-focus blur.

WEB_March2015_Aveline_sleeping

“What scene would I want to be enveloped in
more than this one,
an ordinary night at the kitchen table,
floral wallpaper pressing in,
white cabinets full of glass,
the telephone silent,
a pen tilted back in my hand?

It gives me time to think
about all that is going on outside–
leaves gathering in corners,
lichen greening the high grey rocks,
while over the dunes the world sails on,
huge, ocean-going, history bubbling in its wake.

But beyond this table
there is nothing that I need,
not even a job that would allow me to row to work,
or a coffee-colored Aston Martin DB4
with cracked green leather seats.

No, it’s all here,
the clear ovals of a glass of water,
a small crate of oranges, a book on Stalin,
not to mention the odd snarling fish
in a frame on the wall,
and the way these three candles–
each a different height–
are singing in perfect harmony.

So forgive me
if I lower my head now and listen
to the short bass candle as he takes a solo
while my heart
thrums under my shirt–
frog at the edge of a pond–
and my thoughts fly off to a province
made of one enormous sky
and about a million empty branches.”

-Billy Collins

Curriculum Reviews, Homeschooling, Inspiration

How to Teach Chinese to Kids (When It’s Not Your Native Language)

How to Teach Chinese to Kids (When It's Not Your Native Language) | A List of Easy Mandarin Chinese Learning Resources

I’m not an expert. I didn’t grow up speaking Chinese. But if you’ve followed @oaxacaborn on Instagram or @oaxacaborn on YouTube for any length of time, you’ve heard my daughter speak Chinese. This little fact delights some people, and perplexes others. Now, if you know Aveline, you know that she talks to everyone. EVERYONE, everywhere. Most people, when they hear her speaking Chinese, look bewildered and then quickly look away in confusion. After all, it is completely out of context for a little blonde girl to be reciting traditional Chinese poems down the aisles of Target in the suburbs.

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Why Chinese?

Other people, though ask questions — a lot of questions. Many are just curious, “Why Chinese?”  You’ve heard the old joke, right?

“What do you call a person who knows three languages?”
“Trilingual.”
“What do you call a person who knows two languages?”
“Bilingual.”
“What do you call a person who knows one language?”
“American.”

But I’m not one to talk, since I lost both Spanish and Slovene to the cobwebbed recesses of my brain. So I usually just say, “Why not? Most people around the world learn more than one language, and ~1 billion people speak Mandarin [1]. Only about 480 million people speak English.”

The truth is, while the characters seem intimidating, Chinese grammar is simple when compared to English’s complexities. For the most part, basic Chinese doesn’t concern itself too much with tenses, plurals, the gender of nouns, or articles like a, an, the. There are exceptions to this, of course, but the bottom line is that you can learn Chinese without spending hours pouring over verb conjugations they way you would in, say, French or Spanish. Yes, it’s a tonal language, so the tones are challenging, but children are much better are differentiating pitch than adults — and the earlier a child begins learning Chinese tones, the better. (Here’s a slightly off-topic study on pitch, musical ability, and early language development. But I digress.)

Another question many curious people ask is, “How do you get her to learn Chinese?”

Well, if you have figured out a way to get a human being — much less a four-year-old — to do anything, let me know, because you sure aren’t going to find the answer here. But I can share the resources we use that make the process fun!

Learning Chinese Through YouTube Videos

YouTube is just overflowing with language tutorials, and videos of native speakers demonstrating how to properly pronounce the words and phrases. And it’s free!  YouTube is where it all started, actually. I was trying to find something fun and different for Aveline to engage her brain. She was three, begging to ‘do school’ and ‘have worksheets’ on an almost-hourly basis, and I was going through [English] preschool workbooks like there was no tomorrow.  I really didn’t have some grand, well-thought-out plan to begin Mandarin instruction, I was just trying to get through the afternoon. (True confessions.) She was hooked after just one kids’ video in Mandarin. After that, it took going through several different Mandarin instructional channels before I found a teacher she really connected with, but once we found our favorite teacher, it was amazing how quickly she began speaking Chinese. I can’t recommend Emma form Learn Chinese With Emma highly enough. Our first video? Learning to count from 1-10 in Mandarin Chinese, seen above. Bonus? Learn the numbers, and you’ve learned the tones, without even realizing it.

Flashcards, Audio CDs, and Reference Charts

How to Teach Chinese to Kids

If you ask me, there’s only one solid resource in this category, Tuttle Chinese for Kids: Flash Cards Kit Vol 1!  It’s just that good. This set comes with sixty-four beautifully illustrated, sturdy flashcards, an audio CD with all the vocabulary words in context, as well as a separate 24×36″ poster which shows the front side of all flashcards. We keep the poster out in the living room at all times, at kid-height, and our daughter consults it constantly. I really believe a big part of success in language learning is to make it a part of everyday life, rather than segmenting it off into a separate “learning” time. Isn’t that true with anything, though?

The CD is very well done. Each track was recorded at a relaxed pace, with pauses in just right places, so the child (and you!) can repeat back what’s said. Because this kit is designed for children, it’s a refreshing change from the stale “Where is the airport?” and “Can you exchange this currency?” phrases taught in so many (dull) language programs for adults. All sixty-four vocabulary words are included in the CD, as well as a couple of sentences for each, so each word can be learned in context as well.  The sentences are spoken in Chinese as well as in English — and some of the sentences are even included on the back of the corresponding flashcards. For those interested in the proper stroke order to write the characters, that’s diagrammed on the flashcard back, too.

(With this, as with all our Chinese language resources, we’ve chosen the Traditional Character edition, which teaches the characters used in places outside mainland China, such as Taiwan. If you want to learn Simplified Characters instead, then you’ll want the Tuttle Chinese for Kids: Flash Cards Kit Vol 1: Simplified Character Edition.)

My daughter is in Chinese school — more about that later in this post — and I noticed that the content covered in this set was very on-track with the content covered in the first semester of her class. This week, since we’re already well into the second semester, I ordered the sequel set, Tuttle More Chinese for Kids: Flash Cards.  These sets have turned me into something of a Tuttle fangirl, actually. Tuttle is a speciality publishing house focusing all Asian language, culture and history, and I’ve discovered it’s a terrific place to order books about Chinese, Japanese, Korean, and other Asian cultures.  I guess I can wave zài jiàn 再見 to that money I’d stashed away for a rainy day!

Coloring and Activity Books for Chinese Education: Dover Books

How to Teach Chinese to Kids

Dover Books is another great resource for inexpensive, yet impressively detailed, consumable books. The coloring books, like the Chinese Fashions and Mandarin Picture Word Book titles shown here, have intricate black and white line drawings and historically/linguistically accurate captions. No, it’s not a Chinese language curriculum, but it’s such a fun — and cheap! — way to supplement cultural education. The various Dover Chinese Paper Dolls are great too!

Coloring and Activity Books for Chinese Education: Practical Chinese Series

How to Teach Chinese to Kids

The way Wendy Lin’s Practical Chinese Book Series is titled is a little confusing — at least, it was for me. I ordered Practical Chinese: Traditional Characters for Beginners I at first, but then realized what I really wanted was the first book, Chinese for Children,which is the red coloring/activity book pictured on the left. There’s no bells or whistles here, and the illustrations certainly aren’t high-quality, but the workbook lets very young children begin familiarizing themselves with with Chinese characters through basic coloring pages, matching exercises, and other similar activities.  The book covers body parts, names of clothes, colors, fruits, numbers, and a few adjectives like “big” and “small”. I wouldn’t really call it curriculum, but it’s a good cursory, hands-on introduction for a young, interested, child. (If you’re learning Simplified Characters rather than traditional, then you’ll want Chinese for Children, Simplified Character Edition.)

Chinese Phonetics [Pinyin] and Learning to Read and Write Chinese Characters

How to Teach Chinese to Kids

We started out with mostly spoken Chinese, but now we’re moving on to learning to read and write Chinese characters, since Aveline has expressed a great deal of interest in that. (Ok, fine, my strange child is begging.)  And for reading and writing, I LOVE the Chinese Made Easy for Kids Textbook 1 with CD and the accompanying Chinese Made Easy Workbook 1, which also dives into Chinese pinyin. I think the phonetics aspect might be overwhelming if it was someone’s very first introduction to any kind of Chinese, spoken or written — but already being familiar with spoken Chinese, seeing the pinyin and learning to match them to the tones given on the CD hasn’t actually been very daunting. These books are fun — colorful, energetic, and designed to really motivate and give the child a sense of great accomplishment. They’re early elementary, but could definitely be used for someone older who wanted to start out as well — I’m doing them alongside my daughter. Again, we’re doing the traditional edition, so if you want Simplified Characters instead, you’ll want the Chinese Made Easy for Kids, Simplified Chinese Edition Textbook 1 and Workbook 1.

Your Local Chinese Cultural Center

How to Teach Chinese to Kids

Many areas have an active Chinese-American community association, dedicating to teaching Chinese language, culture, and traditions. Don’t overlook this — it’s is an incredible resource! Through our local cultural center, my daughter not only attends language and folk dance classes each week, but she’s also participated in Chinese festivals like the Mid-Autumn Moon Festival, gotten to watch traditional Chinese opera, lion dance, kung fu and musical showcases, and even performed a Chinese folk dance performance with her classmates at the big local Lunar New Year parade and festival. It’s a terrific, welcoming community, and she (and I!) are able to practice speaking Chinese with native speakers on a regular basis.

Where to Buy Bilingual-Chinese Books, VCDs and More

How to Teach Chinese to Kids

We love to have bilingual and Chinese books around the house, too, to keep the Chinese flowing between classes or workbook sessions. A few places I’ve found to order Chinese books, puzzles, and VCDs (video CDs that get around that pesky DVD region issue) are China Sprout (the site is split into Cultural and Education categories), Language Lizard, Asian Parent, and the Happy Panda Shop.

Where to Listen to Chinese Books and Songs


Like I mentioned before, YouTube is a fantastic, often overlooked treasure trove for language education. On YouTube, you can listen to native speakers reading children’s books in Chinese, or set up a playlist of popular Chinese children’s songs, like the one above. And when you’re ready to search for music videos or other content entirely in Chinese? Head over to Youku (pronounced yo-ku).

Don’t be afraid to begin learning Chinese! To quote a Lao Tzu cliché: “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” And, today’s internet makes the world so much smaller when it comes to venturing out on a journey like this. There are SO many resources available.

How to Teach Chinese to Kids

If you have questions, please leave them in the comments and I’ll do my best to answer! And if you found this helpful, why not click here to get this post’s Permalink, then pin it to Pinterest? :)

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Inspiration

INSPIRATION :: Spring/Summer 2015 TOAST UK Catalogue

Ah, springtime, and with it, another delightfully styled Toast UK collection. I love the specific feeling each of these catalogues evokes, and Early Spring + Spring/Summer 2015 Toast edition is no different. Can’t you just feel the strong, early morning Mediterranean sunshine pouring in through the windows and smell the percolated coffee wafting across the sleepy air?

Toast UK Early SS15 House and Home Lookbook -- Wooden tray, metal coffee percolator

Toast UK SS15 House and Home Lookbook -- Patterned bed linens

Toast UK SS15 House and Home Lookbook  -- Grey cushion covers

Toast UK SS15 House and Home Lookbook  -- Colorful and unusual bathroom towels

Toast UK SS15 House and Home Lookbook  -- Teapot and ceramics

Toast UK SS15 House and Home Lookbook -- Stools with colorful hairpin legs

Toast UK Early SS15 House and Home Lookbook -- Stack of quilts

Toast UK SS15 Women Lookbook  -- Baskets on a donkey

Toast UK SS15 Women Lookbook -- Linen Button-down

Toast UK SS15 Women Lookbook  -- Desert Sunrise

Toast UK Early SS15 Women Lookbook -- Mediterranean Style

Toast UK SS15 Men Lookbook -- Wooden Sunglasses

Can’t get enough of TOAST UK? Me neither! That’s why I’ve been posting these round-ups every year since 2010. You can keep on looking through the TOAST archives, or go directly to a particular season in the list below.

Poetry & Words, Theology

Sojourners in Borrowed Spaces

WEB_Sojourners_Borrowed_Spaces_Oaxacaborn_blog

The dehumidifier broke the other day, and with it went the off-kilter rattle, wheeze and hum to which I’d grown so accustomed. The new machine is better — gathers more of this peninsula’s ever-present moisture, runs more efficiently — but it has a quiet gentle hum I barely recognize. The old noise was the backdrop to months worth of midnights, and the new noise is almost unnerving in its calmness.

The house is that way right now too.

For the last week, the walls of this house held extra laughter, extra noise, extra people, and extra fun. Today, mom and dad are driving back through the Georgia rain, heading up past Tennessee, beyond Illinois, where they’ll slide into the snowy land of Minnesota, home — far away from here.

The house is quiet, and even the sun is subdued.

It’s hard to live far away. They’re not over the river and through the woods; they’re over dozens of rivers and through a thousand miles of woods, and it’s impossible to cross that distance as quickly as a map can fold.

We’ve always been a little far-flung, my family, when it comes to the places we pound our tent stakes. We’ve always been sojourners, the kind of people who put down roots everywhere. We’ve always been this way, since I was a little girl in my first family and now as a wife and mother in my second family. In English, the word “sojourner” means “those who stay somewhere temporarily”; but in Chinese, the word “sojourn” (寄居, jì jū) translates as the idea of living away from home.

And that’s the kind of people we are. We’re not transient, fleeting travelers, floating hither and thither — no. We’re the kind of people who find a place, hammer in the tent stakes with wild abandon, and pour our hearts out onto whatever unfamiliar soil is beneath our feet. 

In Chinese, the hermit crab isn’t called a hermit at all. In Chinese, it’s the sojourner crab (寄居蟹, jì jū xiè) — the sojourner! This has nothing at all to do with hiding or burrowing away from everything, but everything to do with seeing the empty shell in front of you, and being all in when it comes to making this unfamiliar borrowed place a home.

This unfamiliar soil feels like a borrowed place, sometimes. But I’m all in.

I’m all in, filling all the corners and fully living, until the time comes to seize another borrowed shell on some other shore.