Poetry & Words

Letters to Aveline: Thoughts While You’re Asleep (30 Day June Photo Challenge – Day 23 – Black and White)

Black and white photo of Aveline wearing hat with lace flower while chewing on Sophie the Giraffe
 [Click photo to view a larger version.]

Dear Aveline,

You’re quite a character. You’ve discovered grunting, and while it may not be very ladylike, it makes me laugh. You look so seriously at your toys, swat your little hands at them, and grunt as if to warn them that they’re about to be devoured by your nomming little mouth.

You have a beautiful voice. You love to talk, and daddy and I love to listen to you. You look at us, gently reach out your hands to touch our face, and speak delicate words in a language which only you understand.  What will we hear, when we can finally understand you? What of the world around you will you reinterpret to us through your words? Will you tell us of the way the light dances across your quilt in the afternoon, leaving those diamonds of sunshine you’re always trying to pick up?  What names will you give to your favorite stuffed toys?

Black and white photo of plush baby toy and rattle on sheepskin in the sunlight

You enjoy your mealtimes so very much. I tell you God gives food to the little birdies outside, and God paints the pretty colors onto all the flowers. I tell you God gives us the food we have, and we thank him for everything He’s given us. You kick your legs excitedly when I lift you into the highchair — unless you’re feeling impatient, in which case you stiffen your legs, arch your back and let out a squawk or two or ten. Avocado is your favorite, without a doubt.  Yesterday you branched out and happily ate some sweet potato, but made horrible faces at the green beans. Today was a different story. Today, you launched an all-out war against the sweet potato. As if yelling and smacking your palms against the highchair tray wasn’t dramatic enough, you pursed your lips and sprayed me with sweet potato puree. I had to laugh. You looked so indignant.

You’re always moving, always reaching for something. You’ve just discovered you can lift yourself up on your hands and knees and rock. This doesn’t satisfy you for long; you want to go places. Usually you default to your favorite method of locomotion, continuous rolling. Nothing is safe from your curiosity, really. You can roll across the living room floor at an alarming rate. Much to daddy’s chagrin, you unplug the xbox controllers on what seems to be a daily basis. The curtains have all been shortened as you can’t resist the tempting, billowing fabric. Figuring out ways to pull your books off the lowest shelf seems to be a favorite.

Lately, you and I have been going to the pool in the afternoon. I stand in the water and hold you, and you grin from ear to ear and splash the water with your feet. Sometimes you stop, your feet still and your fingers gripping me. You peek out from under your lacey sunhat hesitantly, trying to understand what the other pool-goers are doing.  If someone accidentally splashes you, you scrunch your face into a wrinkly grimace and hold on to me more tightly. Today, you fell asleep on my shoulder on the walk back to the house.

You’re a treasure, beautiful girl, a gift from God. Daddy and I love you so very much.


Your Mama

Poetry & Words

letters to aveline: your beautiful voice

 my beautiful baby girl wearing a pink calico dress and lavender bloomers, laying on periwinkle fabric

Dear Aveline,

I love how happy you are. You bring me so much joy. You’ve recently added many new sounds to your vocabulary in the past couple weeks, and your babbling voice is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard. You sound like you must have come straight from heaven. In a way, you did. You’re the answer to our prayers.

Yesterday, you discovered your feet. You spent an unbelievable amount of time bent over, intently grabbing at your feet. You grunted in the most hilarious way. And I am sorry, but I couldn’t help but laugh when you got squawking mad because you were unable to pull off your toes.

I love you, my little sweets.

Always and forever,
Your mama

Poetry & Words

letters to aveline: mama’s gonna buy you a mockingbird

hush little baby now don't you cry / daddy loves you and so do i

dear aveline,

we didn’t sleep so well last night, you and i. (and daddy makes three). you tossed and turned until midnight, and then finally fell asleep at 12:30. you were up again at 2 and didn’t fall asleep until 3. up again at 5. i was so tired i could hardly see straight, but somehow just your tiny little presence, restless in my arms, filled me with happy joy.

you wouldn’t go back to sleep, so around 6:30 i started singing softly to you, hush little baby, don’t say a word / mama’s gonna buy you a mockingbird…

and you smiled at me. you looked up through your little tears and red-rimmed eyes and smiled at me. …and if that mockingbird don’t sing / mama’s gonna buy you a diamond ring…

my heart melted, and just kept on melting …and if that diamond ring turns brass…

your eyes slowly fluttered closed, then opened again to look at me …mama’s gonna buy you a looking glass…

i heard soft clinking sounds coming from the kitchen, and smelled coffee in the air. …and if that looking glass gets broke…

you sighed, a deep, satisfied sigh, and drifted into a peaceful sleep as the first rays of dawn peeked through the windows and cast soft shadows over your sleeping body. i could feel my eyelids getting heavier and heavier. your daddy walked into the room, set a fresh cup of coffee down on the bedside table, kissed my forehead, and said, you can drink it later.

and then we slept, baby. you and i. after that restless night, we slept.

so hush little baby / don’t you cry / daddy loves you / and so do i

love, your mama

Poetry & Words

WRITING & WORDS :: i love you so much it hurts: a letter to aveline

Oaxacaborn - baby Aveline Alenka - black and white baby portait - close upmy precious, precious girl,

i love you so much it hurts. you’re sleeping now, in the next room, and every once in a while i run back into the room just to look at you. that hasn’t gotten old yet, and here you are 10 weeks old this wednesday. you changed everything when you were born, lovie, and i wouldn’t have it any other way.

you’re pure joy. i love the way you smile so widely your eyes are nearly closed. i love how you look so intently at daddy when he’s talking to you, and love how you imitate the sounds with your tiny little painted-on cherub lips. you bring us so much happiness, baby girl. we prayed for you, love, we definitely did. and God answered our prayers and gave you to us. you’re our aveline alenka, our radiant, full-of-light, wished for and longed for child. that’s what your name means, you know.

you are a beautiful miracle. i can’t believe how fast you’re growing. it seems like just yesterday you were impossibly tiny, your hands hidden in the sleeves of the newborn shirts and your waist too tiny for newborn pants. and now here you are, reaching for the ruffled hem of your sundress and putting it in your mouth.

speaking of the sun — you’re not so much a fan of that, yet. you scrunch up your face and arch your back when the sun hits your little face. but the wind, oh, you are mama’s girl for sure in the wind. you happily let it wash over you, looking out into the world with those gorgeous eyes of yours.

and now, baby, your tiny cries from the next room are calling to me. i’m coming to get you, baby. coming to hold you, and change your diaper, and feed you, and love you always&forever.

always&forever, baby. always&forever.


your mama.

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